from I Saw the Angel in the Marble, Chris and Ellyn Davis:

I recently read a study which concluded that 85% of all communication aimed at three year olds is either telling the child not to do something or how bad he is for having done what he just did. I was astonished. What are all these three year olds doing that they need such continual correction? I would suspect that most of the time they are simply being curious. they are exploring, and, in so doing getting into things they “shouldn’t” be getting into.

John Holt is quoted later in the passage giving his perception:

All that energy and foolishness, all that curiosity, questions, talk, all the fierce passions and inconsolable sorrows, immoderate joys, seem to many to be a nuisance to be endured if not a disease to be cured. To me, they are a national asset, a treasure beyond price, more necessary to our health and our very survival than any oil or uranium or name what you will.

85% ought to stop us in our tracks. What can we do to turn that percentage on its ear? Can we adjust the environment to allow for more exploration and safe participation? Can we adjust the schedule to allow for more rest for the adults so they can respond more positively? Can we replace “Stop” with “Try this” instead? Redirection is so much nicer than reprimand. I am not sure many of us grown-ups could function long if 85% of our feedback from those around us was negative. My thin-skinned self shrivels up with far less than that.

The Davis’ state that they are not unschoolers but they, like me, share John Holt’s deep appreciation of childhood. I am challenged to look at childish enthusiasm not as a burden but a blessing. It is a rare opportunity for us to experience once more the boundless joy that comes so naturally to little bitty people. How do we lose that? Maybe the answer lies someplace in that 85%

I saw this post on Raw Mom (I know. Just when you think you figured out what we eat too….) and had to laugh:

The other day Mika was having trouble concentrating on her homeschooling and I just finally said it like I felt it:
“Mika, I’m really frustrated and I don’t quite know how to respond to you right now.”
“Mom, if you would get more sleep, spend less time in front of the computer, and stop eating late at night, you wouldn’t be so frustrated.”
I stood there stunned. Caught in my own trap.
“Mika. Thanks.”
She’s 7, by the way.

From the mouths of babes.

I loved this one too:

childhood is not merely a preparation for living, it IS living. Children are not apprentices for adulthood, though they are usually treated as such. This is a huge mistake. Because what is actually a valid and complete period in life turns into a second-class affair,

A child who is being trained in the Montessori system should also, as soon as it is at all possible, beging to share in the work of the household. If he is provided with a small broom and dustpan there is no reason why he should not keep his room fresh and clean and also clean up the litter of paper or dirt which he makes in the course of the day.

Pains should be taken to allow even the very little child to watch from a comfortable position any household operation in which he shows an interest. Fortunate indeed the child whose mother still cooks and sews and bakes and washes and allows her children to aid in these processes. Such children receive Montessori training without any formal apparatus.

-Dorothy Canfield Fisher 1913

Wendy Fidler discusses Teaching the Montessori Baby to Think in this article from Montessori Internat’l.

Michael Olaf has more resources for the 0-3 group.