If growing up means
It would be beneath my dignity to climb a tree,
I'll never grow up, never grow up, never grow up
Not me!
– Peter Pan
Author Archives: Kim Halloran-Fry
from grass stained sleeves
“Passion is lifted from the earth itself by the muddy hands of the young; it travels along grass-stained sleeves to the heart."
After a long day in the car but before unpacking the suitcases their Dad suggested we go outside and walk as far as we could before sunset. He and Brendan slowed down to throw the football back and forth. Abbie skipped over to a patch of dandelions, grabbing as many as she could.
By the time we got back to our hotel room all the cobwebs were blown out along with those seed heads. Everyone was finally ready to curl up under the blankets for the night.
And I am finally working through the Last Child in the Woods, thinking of all the places to explore this summer. There are going to be lots of evenings like this, God willing.
A Place of Refuge
A welcoming home is a place of refuge, a place where people worn down by the noise and turmoil and hostility of the outside world can find a safe resting place. A welcoming home is a place that you and others enjoy coming home to.
If you live in a house with small children you may already be shaking your head. "What do you mean, 'noise and turmoil of the outside world?' I have to leave home to get away from noise and turmoil!"
But even in the rough and tumble of family living, home can be a safe haven and even a place of quiet (at least some of the time). And especially if noise and activity crowd your life making the extra effort to create a sense of refuge in the midst of it can pay off wonderful dividends.
Besides, a refuge is not a hole where you disappear to eat and sleep and then emerge to go about the business of life. A welcoming home is where real life happens. It's where personalities are nurtured, where growth is stimulated, where people feel free not only to be themselves but to develop their best selves. That caring, nurturing quality – not the absence of noise or strife – is what makes a home a refuge.
Emilie's words have guided my vision of home for 30 years and helped me to understand that this refuge could be created in a cinder block, multi-family, government unit just as well as in a Georgian farmhouse. It was more about your purpose for your house than the house itself – how it was used, why you were there, and how you emerged from it, for better or worse.
Regardless of where you spend your days, we all go "home" eventually. It is worth the effort to consider what steps we can take to make it a place we long to return to, a true refueling station, a place from which we can launch our best and strongest selves, and a place where we can return to and integrate all those fascinating experiences we have other places.
* photograph from a welcoming old home turned inn where we stayed last month
Pax
The motto was "Pax" but the word was set in a circle of thorns.
Pax: Peace, but what a strange peace, made of unremitting toil and effort – seldom with a seen result: subject to constant interruptions, unexpected demands, short sleep at nights, little comfort, sometimes scarce food: beset with disappointments and usually misunderstood,
yet peace all the same, undeviating, filled with joy and gratitude and love.
"It is My own peace I give you." Not, notice, the world's peace.
These opening lines in Rumor Godden's classic relate to cloistered nuns…or do they?
What a strange peace it is indeed, yes? But so very true.
May Daybook
Maybe we call it a May-book?
Outside: Sunny and 50's. We have had a lot of stormy weather recently. We watched our big aspen lurching into the open part of the yard as a couple roots snapped right in half. It will need to come down now, google tells us, but it is hard to believe it while it's still so green. We then lost power for 8hrs the other day when a power line pole was struck and caught fire. The little ravine our gutters empty into completely filled up after this last storm. Neighbor said it was the first time in 20 years he had ever seen that.
So yeah. Crazy weather but beautiful blue skies once again. They always come back if you ride it out.
Wearing: You're probably like, who cares right? Fwiw, it's some coral ankle length cotton pants, white tee, and a denim jacket for appointments today. Fun look back at fashion by the year here.
Reading: fiction. New fiction at that. This, friends, surprises me. More Chris Bohjalian which quite honestly freaked me the heck out. I grabbed it on the way out of the library and then was taken aback at the opening graphic depictions. NOT g rated. Be clear on that point. This is more a review than a recommendation. I admit though the writing was skillful and one could never, ever be lukewarm about human trafficking after reading. Am choosing a different genre for the next read though, since that is the next best thing to mind bleach.
Tess is all Nancy Drew these days. Steadily working her way across the shelf of the library.
Fitness: Spring training for mom happening now. It's been a good month. Slow but steady progress. This is my last year of the first half century of my life. God willing I will be entering the second half strong. Today was a good day starting this way. Yesterday I was so tired and frustrated with some new resistance exercises I overshot and ended up collapsing on the carpet. There may have been some tears involved. I just got up today and hit it again. Persistance wins right?
In the kitchen: there is an Instapot pressure cooker on the way! Sending up a prayer it is the answer to my weekday dinner time crunch. Are you in on this latest and greatest gadget? Friends have added me to Facebook groups and this promises to revolutionize meal prep. Paleo Instapot recipes here 5 jillion instapot pins here.
From the learning room: Finishing the last few books for several students. Lighting a (motivational) fire under one other…. The boys have been busy with extracurricular sports. We are enjoying exploring some old shows on youtube like Liberty Kids, Wishbone, Bill Nye and even Cover to Cover (yes, I am that old) which follows my best motto of "Speak slow, Speak low." And if you are also a midcentury mom you might remember Write On and probably also saw that one played on a filmstrip…
In other news: Moira has saved up for and purchased her first car. Her brother has been driving me around prepping for his license. I am awed at the passage of time this represents. Not sad at the speed of it, nor particularly anxious for it to hurry up. It's rolling along as it should.
Around the house: I picked up this set of embroidered linens from the antique sale. There had been another similar set at the flea market in Germany which left me with serious reverse buyer's remorse when I left them there. Now they are here. My young German friend tells me they say:
What mother bestowed upon me once
shall be smoothly and prettily ordered,
I treasure/hold it up it in this closet,
like once my mother did.
In community: Such a time we have had. A dear older lady we know had a massive stroke. We helped get her home for hospice and were blessed to help in the small ways we could until her death the other day. It has been so good to have something purposeful to be a part of.
We meantime are awaiting confirmation of what looks to be a grave diagnosis for my mother. The past weeks have been chock full of discussions and decisions, texts and calls. Some of those have been middle of the night which probably explains the being flattened on the carpet part above.
How do you navigate times like these? St. Therese is a good model:
"If I did not simply live from one moment to another, it would be impossible for me to be patient, but I look only at the present, I forget the past, and I take good care not to forestall the future. When we yield to discouragement or despair it is usually because we think too much about the past and the future. But, pray much for me."
yes, please : )
Get set…go!
We have another runner in the family. It's still not me. This time it's not long distance either, but track. It's been a lot of fun to watch his events. It's like a three ring circus in a good way. Something is happening both on the track and inside the field at any given time.
I wasn't a big sports fan or participant in school but I have come to really value what it offers our kids. More than competition and teamwork, which are also great, it is fresh air, lots of tiring exercise, time away from screens. It fits in well with our "just go outside" outlook. Stressed? Go outside awhile. Run it off. Get a change of scenery. Most things look better afterwards.
an opportunity
Some afternoon fun with their friends. Maybe it works, maybe not. So far they have loved watching the seeds sprout at least. I will be watching a patch in the yard since the dog walked through and upended one tray. We may or may not see some runaway zinnias this summer. : )
"Give the children an opportunity to make a garden. Let them grow what they will. It matters less that they grow good plants than that they try for themselves."
– Liberty Hyde Bailey
gratefully and joyously
"Glorious St. Joseph, model of all who are devoted to labor, obtain for me the grace to work in the spirit of penance in expiation of my many sins; to work conscientiously by placing love of duty above my inclinations; to gratefully and joyously deem it an honor to employ and to develop by labor the gifts I have received from God, to work methodically, peacefully, and in moderation and patience, without ever shrinking from it through weariness or difficulty to work; above all, with purity of intention and unselfishness, having unceasingly before my eyes death and the account I have to render of time lost, talents unused, good not done, and vain complacency in success, so baneful to the work of God. All for Jesus, all for Mary, all to imitate thee, O patriarch St. Joseph! This shall be my motto for life and eternity."
– St Joseph the Worker Prayer
When I read this prayer for the feast day today it painted such a convicting picture of how to apply ourselves to our daily work, whether at home or away. It is arguably even more essential to approach work done at home and for our family with those virtues as our guide.
Here's to a peaceful, productive week!
America the Beautiful – Farmer’s Market
Or that time we had ice cream for dinner. They serve some epic ice cream at the roadside market in Mount Vernon, WA. People stand in lines that trail outside the building and out into the garden. If you ask around 'everyone' knows where to go. So of course we had to give it a try. It was late afternoon when we arrived at the market. The sun was slowly sinking lower in the sky but the air was still warm and breezy.
We passed the time while waiting visiting with the man in front of us and his little dog. He turned around, did a quick head count of the dozen-plus of our family and friends, then threw back his head and laughed it was a darn good thing he had gotten in line ahead of us. Truth! The whole scooping of softball-sized artisan ice cream scoops into hand-wrapped cones fresh from the waffle iron takes time.
Slow food is the best food. It was a perfect way to ease into the evening after a whole day in the sunshine. The kids loaded into the van, full and happy, and most of them promptly drifted off to the oldies playing on the dashboard radio.
Good friends, great day.
a visitor
When I walked to the driveway the other day the boys mentioned, "Bat."
"What?" I said.
"There's a bat stuck in the tree." For whatever reason the first thing that came to mind was they had thrown a baseball bat into the tree and it got tangled someplace. Not that they play baseball. I didn't say it was a logical thought, just that first one. Anyway it wasn't a ball bat but rather a real little brown/black bat sleeping soundly smack on the side of the tree trunk at about chest height.
I ran through my limited repertoire of bat facts which includes the part that seeing them behave out of character during the daytime is often a sign of a sick bat and could spell trouble. Rabies alert went off in my head, except that he was doing appropriate daytime bat stuff, namely sleeping.
After a quick check with my favorite biologist, we decided to leave him alone and see what happened after dark. It seems they can get disrupted and displaced and sometimes fall back asleep in unlikely spots. Amazingly he slept straight through the noise of the boys' game of horse which could normally wake the dead. His little side fluttered ever so faintly so we knew he was alive though not budging. Finally one of the times I walked out he had up and flown away and was not spotted again.
Starry Sky Journal 