"Who hath despised the day of small things?"
"…rejoice." Zechariah 4:10
breakfast book - 30's novel picked up at the antique store
Author Archives: Kim Halloran-Fry
super
Preparations well underway at our house for this, one of the biggest days of the year for my guys. Kieran asked for an early birthday party to coincide with Superbowl so we have some themed cupcakes at the ready.
He really wanted a print for his room from this season of his too so we had this framed.
Hope you have a super fun Superbowl day as well, birthday or not. Chances are good it will happen a LOT earlier in your day than it will here in ours <g> You have to be REALLY dedicated to watch football in the middle of the night.
Yours truly here, took pictures beforehand and will be fast asleep long before then.
Fly high
Fly high. A now familiar send off to step dancers. That is just what they did in their first feis in England. It was a little intimidating, like moving into the big leagues. Our dancers did a respectable job and were quite inspired. Dean Crouch, a successful young dancer turned musician, played in one hall which was a treat in itself. Even better was seeing friends from our old dance school who had come for the feis.
I should have mentioned it was a long day. : )
keeping sons close
"How many of them are boys?" People usually want to know when they discover that we have ten children. How many of those children are boy children? Because the higher that particular number is the louder the gasps as a rule. "Six boys? Wow. You must be a saint." I assure you, as can those six, that I am not. However I might suggest there is such a saint we might want to try to emulate in this case: John Bosco. He knows boys. I might be juggling six strapping young men. He cared for hundreds with one devoted woman, his mother. If they could do so well, surely we can do this too.
John Bosco was fatherless himself, having been raised by a widow. He took pity on the street urchins of his day, looked upon with judgement and disgust, kicked to the curb and urged on and away like so many stray dogs. He rejected the idea that genetics dictates character. He sensed that coercion and harsh discipline only bred bitterness and rebellion. He set about to test his theory that change is possible once you gain the affection and respect of your charges. In fact, he was pretty sure that was the only way.
Turns out he was right.
Boys flocked to his oratory which mushroomed quickly and grew into multiple homes and schools which continue to this day to employ his 'preventative system'. What is that you ask? Well it is directly opposed to the repressive system prevalent in his day and we could argue, still in pretty regular use.
"The repressive system consists in making the law known to the subjects, and afterwards watching to discover the transgressors of these laws and inflicting, when necessary, the punishment deserved….
Quite different from this and I might even say opposed to it, is the preventive system. It consists in making regulations known, and then watching carefully so that the pupils may at all times be under the vigilant eye of the Rector or the assistants, who like loving fathers can converse with them, take the lead in every movement and in a kindly way give advice and correction; in other words, this system places the pupils in the impossibility of committing faults."
Like the Montessori system he allowed freedom within limits. "Do anything you like, just do not sin." And he meant it. He knew boys needed to run and jump and whoop and holler. His was not a somber school. He learned to juggle and do gymnastics. Anything to capture their attention and win their hearts. Teachers were urged to enter into those childish pastimes, "like what the boys like, and the boys will come to like what the superiors like." They were to take the time to truly know the boys and learn their games, participate.
They were most importantly to be present. He took to heart the proverb which reminds us that children left to themselves bring shame upon their mothers – and fathers of course. To that end, those in charge of children were to be observant, to enter into their play and their work. To come up alongside versus direct from afar. To set them up for success.
Do we do that? Are we present throughout the whole day? Are they right alongside of us cooking, washing, reading, shopping, gardening. Or do we send children to make their beds or brush their teeth or give a general direction to "clean your room" while we take a phone call or check mail or watch a tv program and then rail and fuss later when those things are poorly done? Do we send them off to play unsupervised and then regretfully discover they have picked up bad language or habits?
John Bosco exhorts us instead to love and participate genuinely and to be genuinely invested. He urges us to avoid at all costs "cold legislation". His dying request was this:
Do you know what this old man who has spent his life for his dear boys, wants from you?
(to return to) the days of affability and mutual forbearance for the love of Jesus Christ; the days when hearts were open in all simplicity and candour, the days of charity and true happiness for all.
Only then could they hope to communicate the truths of the Faith, and a moral and practical education. That is the only way we can hope to do it as well.
If there is a secret to raising boys – to raising all children – I think it is this. We must enter into their lives, love their loves, understand their dreams. We must guard their hearts and minds and be vigilant about outside influences. Garbage in, garbage out. We must respect them as children of God as well of ourselves. We have to stay on the same team ultimately.
This is the way of peace in the home.
These are my thoughts at the end of this feast day.
If you'd like to learn more about the prevantative system you can read here and here and here. We are watching this movie together this week.
Coloring page here
A short play for children to perform here
about happy things, and the rest
The happy thing to talk about is tea today with these two. It has not been easy to get a table at this little tea room near the antique barn. The posted hours seem to be more suggestions than hard-and-fast opening and closing times. We tried to bring Megan a few weeks ago. We tried a couple days ago to take all the girls. That time we came very close. It was open when we arrived at the barn, but all the lights were out and doors locked before closing time. I was half expecting the same this afternoon when we came on Alannah's day off but we hit the jackpot. Tea and cakes while watching the wind and drizzle pick up out the windows.
That is the happy thing. The not-so-happy thing was the tree down in the road later in the evening. Or the lorry that hit us from behind. This is life too, yes? Not all tea and cakes. Still, we are all three safe and well and the driver has sent all his company's information to cover us it seems. Just am a little rattled still which explains editing in the wee hours. So off to bed with me now.
busy hands
We have had the girls friends visiting from Germany this week and have been on the go daily. While Moira was out last week her brothers and sisters worked to finish her birthday surprises for her "friends" birthday dinner.
Kieran really wanted to mix up the cotton candy cupcakes Alannah had planned. While she was at work he got his supplies together and gave it a whirl. A little ways into the process he thought something was off. He reread and realized he had forgotten the eggs. That was soon fixed up and he had them all ready to frost when the girls got home.
The little girls got to work seasoning the new cutting boards. You know all these jobs are easier done yourself but this is about the process. The end goal isn't a finished job, but busy hands and minds learning something they didn't know and understanding they make valuable contributions even when they are small.
I have been challenging myself to use up all the new veggies the landlord has brought us. The other night I tackled a new recipe for the fresh sprouts sauteed with bacon. It was really good and super filling. A little went a long way. The new Country Living (British) magazine featured parsnips so that's the next culinary adventure.
enchantment
"The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a magical event. You go to bed in one kind of a world and wake up in another quite different, and if this is not enchantment then where is it to be found?"
– JB Priestly
It was serendipity if ever there was that. A three day weekend and totally snowed in. A pile of kids spilling out of the doors and into this white wonderland. It wasn't terribly cold so it was a challenge to keep people "properly dressed." There is also someone eating snow in almost every frame from the day. Before long the snow was airborne and they were dodging in and out of hedges and snowballs were launched up and over walls. The washer and dryer were humming into the night with wet mittens and jackets and socks.
inside, out
"…only in the winter, in the country, can you have longer, quiet stretches when you can savor belonging to yourself."
~Ruth Stout
winter’s blooming
I have been talking to Susan (from High Desert Home and My Summer Notebook) about an awesome list of healthy happy habits she shared just before she closed down shop online. One of her counsels was:
Keep Fresh Flowers in the House
Some good reasons can be found here. I picked up a pot of bulbs last week and they are blooming already in the heat of the kitchen. It is wonderful to look over yellow blooms out onto the white snow.
angelus
Wishing you a peaceful, prayerful Sunday.
Starry Sky Journal 