We had a quiet dinner at home for Alannah's 23rd birthday. It has been such a blessing having her here as long as we have. Ours have tended to fly from the nest earlier vs later. In her case, having a wonderful local college nearby and lots of privacy at home has made for a practical arrangement for this very responsible young woman. These days are numbered no doubt. We get few birthdays with our faraway adult children, so we relish celebrations together at home when we can get them.
We are wrapping up a short trip to the Uintahs. Connection is sketchy so this will be necessarily short. While reading during some down time I ran across Jane Kenyon's poignant poem Otherwise. I was thinking of it when I saw this picture of my dog and I pausing partway up Mt Timpagonos. We are a little sore after our climb, but grateful for this very good day. I take not one single one of these for granted.
Otherwise
I got out of bed
on two strong legs.
It might have been
otherwise. I ate
cereal, sweet
milk, ripe, flawless
peach. It might
have been otherwise.
I took the dog uphill
to the birch wood.
All morning I did
the work I love.
At noon I lay down
with my mate. It might
have been otherwise.
We ate dinner together
at a table with silver
candlesticks. It might
have been otherwise.
I slept in a bed
in a room with paintings
on the walls, and
planned another day
just like this day.
But one day, I know,
it will be otherwise.
~ Jane Kenyon
I came across a wonderful summer bucket list a teacher made for her students encouraging them to experience all nature has to offer this summer. My artsy kids were inspired to take the framework of her sketch and make their own list to which we continue to add more ideas. The four element categories remind us to broaden and balance our study of the natural world and incorporate more aspects of it into our summer days. I should clarify that our love of the natural world does in no way verge on the magical in a religious sense. We simply believe the Creator made a rich, multi-faceted world for us to enjoy. A feast for the senses.
I have also been thinking about some ideas Donna Simmons had years ago about therapeutic or healing education and addressing the full spectrum of needs in a child versus focusing solely on the intellectual. Her thoughts would be echoed later by Kim John Payne in Simplicity Parenting. It's a big busy world. Who of us does not feel a tangible peace spreading when we light a candle before dinner or at church, when we gather around a campfire, when we run a warm bath at the end of a hectic day, when we dig in our gardens, or feel a little rush as the kite tugs back on its string? We are on top of to do lists, academic goals, lessons, meetings. Why not also be intentional about incorporating those simple things that ground us and brings us back to that quiet place where we can regroup and shore up again? Peace, it's a good thing.
Some ways we checked off the bucket list lately….
Some opportunities to explore this week:
Outside: Summer announced its commencement with temperatures approximating those on the surface of Venus. Ok, I exaggerate. (no, it's true, I do that sometimes) We have been spoiled by exceptionally mild weather for some time now. It was bound to happen. I was not prepared for it to happen at the moment I walked outside thinking I would plant a couple extra annuals this afternoon is all. Check the forecast, self.
Speaking of planting though – look at us planting stuff! I just mentioned a while back that I enjoy gardening about as much as I enjoy cooking. That was super tongue in cheek for those who don't know me. (I don't usually enjoy either) However all that changed with truckloads of new dirt. New dirt being better than old dirt, our kids wanted to know. In this case, yes. WAY. We had nasty gray fill dirt in our back yard which was essentially incapable of supporting plant life. The sloping side of the house had eroded borders as well. The additional topsoil is amazing. Fingers crossed the new plants 'take.' Probably could use more of these…
A nearly there shot. Mulch to follow…
Wearing: Coral tee and coral and white cotton A line skirt. Comfy.
Listening to:
Aidan and I found some common musical ground.
Reading: The funnies.
We have gotten two papers delivered the past week or so. We don't subscribe here but have veen thinking about it. The three youngest don't remember when we got the Sunday paper regularly while living in Colorado and had not read newspaper comics before. Such a treat. This was my fave
Laughing at myself here. I really could use a seven second delay.
In 'real' book reading news I have been slogging through The Scarlet Letter waiting for it to pick up. It hasn't. This concerns my teens to no end. I think I am going to start over and read it aloud to them. Say a prayer for us.
The younger three have enjoyed some slightly irreverent histories:
Poop Happened Which is about pretty much what it sounds like. Some things are constant. Death, taxes, and waste disposal. Tess now knows how the latter has been handled through time.
They also devoured Nathan Hale's Hazardous Tale's. Disclaimer – I have not devoured them myself so if you find offensive content, please know I am clueless.
Creating: An outdoor dining space out of a sad sorry table and chairs which were painful to behold. They were increasingly painful to sit upon as well due to the inevitable splinters. We came very close to tossing the whole thing. Then it occurred to me to tackle it for my husband's birthday surprise since the deck is literally his favorite room of the "house" in summer. Tess, did not love gardening like Brendan did but she was a good sport for refinishing furniture. We sanded the whooooole thing yesterday morning. Then realized we got the wrong color stain. Ran to replace and stained with deck wood waterseal. The transformation was incredible. My husband was on the phone with his mother when he got home. He had wandered out to the deck to finish his conversation and was gesturing wildly through the kitchen window. We did good. Even if my arms and back are complaining today. $25 for a second life for the set plus more $5 Walmart cushions.
With this success under our belts I think the bathroom cabinets will soon follow. Soon, being a relative term.
From the kitchen: People, check out my new favorite food. (we added a nut to each) Our friends Annie and Mike made these when we were over. I was able to replicate with no disasters. SO so good. I want one right now.
But I am not having one right now because A) husband and I ate every last one of the last batch and B) IF
What is IF you say? Well….
Towards wellness:
Exploring Intermittent Fasting. Our boys have been practicing forms of this with great success. It is connected with improvement in autoimmune conditions as well. Giving it a shot. Most likely this will be on Friday's right now given that the Church has built in a day of the week, days of each season (ember days), and one entire season (lent) to eating exactly like this. Looks like what is good for the soul is also good for the body.
It was such a rare blessing to meet friends from California and friends from Maryland in this beautiful place. We aren't exactly halfway but it worked out that we could all get here at the same time which is something of a mini miracle. While we were all in the same vicinity each family did their own hiking based on the age of their kids and what everyone wanted to see. Our family opted to hit Kolob Canyon this trip. We had driven into Zion and it is breathtaking. Truly. But it is pretty "people-y" in this, the high season. I'm not a crowd lover let's say. My husband did some homework and found some less traveled but still amazing trails for us. (ps we do plan to go back again in off season)
On this hike we went down to the canyon floor and followed the river. There was forest and red rocks all along the sides of the trail.
The temps were in the upper 90's much of this weekend but we got some wind while hiking which kept things comfortable. Ducking into the shade of red rocks helped too.
These little lizards were spotted several times darting across the path. We didn't see many other hikers which meant lots of little critters were daring to come out.
"Look! It's a dinosaur face!"
It's always a treat to find a semi-secluded trail and I can't tell you how amazing it is to see these places. I won't pretend that all family members are equally enthusiastic over every single hiking or sight seeing excursion however. That's just not real life. Kids are delightful. They skip rocks over pond water. They hide behind big trees and leap out when you pass. They yodel off the top of the summit to see if their voices echo back.
Kids. Are. Awesome.
Kids are also childish at times, being that they are children and all. Their shoes bother them. They drop the last protein bar in the sand. Sunscreen annoys. So do brothers. Or sisters. And you would not believe the passion with which they can argue that riding a scooter round and round and ROUND the pavement of the RV park is a better option than seeing, oh, you know, a NATIONAL PARK. They can however.
One person was having such a day when we began this hike. It was sort of the pits for a while. In fact that part was kind of a drag riiiiiiight up to the turn around spot at which point all of a sudden it was SO much fun crossing the stream hopping on the dry rocks or being the first to notice the huge butterfly or watching the grasshoppers fly through the air. The snacks were good. The drink hit the spot. All was well with the world for the second leg of the hike.
Thing is, it always ends that way. It would be swell if every single family member was always on the same positive page. That's not real life though. Still there are ways to deal with those crummy scenarios which can get everyone back on board and keep your sanity as well. You can listen. You can empathize. You can troubleshoot little problems. Sometimes you encourage them to push through anyway because you know something awesome is up ahead and it would be such a shame to miss it because of a temporary bad mood. Perspective – you've got it, they don't. If you can just keep your game face on and encourage them to hang on for a little bit it pretty much always turns around and ends on a high note.
So that's how we hike. My disclaimer is that all the above applies to generally well children who are rested and fed and in good health. Sometimes we get frustrated when a child's behavior is really the fault of a parent who has not met their needs and planned appropriately. That's no good obviously. Empathy goes a long way. Know when they for real are not ok and call it. As the saying I've shared before goes, "The purpose of the task is to strengthen the relationship."
So here we are refueling. You get to the end of the trail some hikes and look at each other and the two of you just have to laugh because he is wearing one sock since he gave the other to a child whose shoe was bothersome. His giant Curious George hat was claimed shortly after that. And someone got wet. And two were having a hysterical conversation in made up voices. And one joked that little kids were fired from the next hike. And you're sort of tired and sore but happy you did it anyway and suddenly it all strikes you as super funny. It just really is.
You gotta laugh y'all. It's a crazy life.
Alannah sent me some video she took so you can walk along with us for a minute. We are working on getting more video. #goals
Summer festival season has begun and we couldn't be happier. We almost didn't make this one due to tackling some home ownership issues. (I am tellin' you, folks, I'm still ambivalent about home ownership.) In the end my husband shooed the girls and I out the door for a few hours for some distraction and fun. The arts fest provided both.
The first band we heard was a little trippy to be honest but when the next began to warm up we were so glad we hung around.
Nitrogen ice cream! Not sure if it is altogether much different from the regular variety but it definitely makes for some visual impact! Bubblegum please, said the girls. I remember choosing that myself when my Gram would take me to Baskin Robbins back in the day. So good.
We bought some art, we made some art, we listened to some art. Summer is off to a very good start.
Let me preface by saying we fully intended to honor our nation's fallen heroes at the cemetary memorial service this weekend. Then….stuff….happened. A couple unnamed children decided to camp out the night before. At 3:30am I got a text from the neighbor explaining child one had an intestinal upset and was coming home. At 4:15am child two bailed. You can apparently be scared…..um… "witless" in a tent in the dark even if you are used to RV-ing all over. So these tired parents stayed home Monday but made a great day of it. On to the update…..
Outside: Sun, sun, sun. We are into the upper 80's once more. The yardwork has begun for the season. The first load of landscaping dirt has filled in the eroding bed in front of the house and more will follow. Lots more. So much dirt. I have high hopes this dirt will net us both an updated tidier landscape and with any luck – ground something can grow in.
In other outdoor news we have given the hand me down patio furniture a fresh coat of paint. New $5 and $8 (I swear, yes!) cushions from Walmart made me super happy. There are so many fabulous colors to choose from today! In the end I got primary colors since they go well with our dishes and inexpensive party supplies.
Creating: Birdhouses. It's been a slow project like many of our projects go BUT this one is nearly done. Just waiting for sealing now. The children picked up the Home Depot kits at the environmental field trip a few weeks ago. I came home one evening to find them hammering away with their dad outside. And Monday, we painted.
Wearing: my reading glasses. Truth be told I have had them for several years now. Initially they mostly came in handy when in dimly lit scenarios, to read labels or thread a needle. This morning as I sat down to the computer I found them to be especially helpful. There are wonderful tools for this natural consequence of aging. We are lucky to have them. Yet, moments such as these are unavoidable reminders of the relentless passing of time.
In other 'wearing' news I've purged my closet once again. The sewing machine is making a more regular appearance and hemming and altering is in full swing. Today's outfit – chambray tie top, black knit skirt, black sandals.
Listening to: piano practice. Abbie Rose is calling out "B! G! A!" Tess has her first and possibly last piano competition under her belt now. She is naturally fearless and was not the least bit nervous. She also was not terribly driven to perfect a piece she didn't love and wasn't any more compelled to "beat" anyone else. The evaluation was helpful however, upon reading her marks and comments, she and we all remarked that there were no surprises there. She memorizes well, has her techniques down, needs more metronome work, and should strive to play more dramatically. Her lack of passion for the piece and for the event was evident. She absolutely adores playing the piano however. This seems to be another in a long string of lessons for our family that our passions need not commercial nor competitive to be validated. Her momma is working on learning this one as well.
From the kitchen: lots of fresh food and grilled entrees are saving me right now. Chopped salads, roasted veggies, melons, and chicken or beef or sausages on the grill are staple dinners.
From the learning room: two finished their curriculum early, two running late, one is about on target. Even in a large family no two students are just exactly alike. They are all on their own journey. This was especially pressed on my heart this weekend talking to one of my adult children. This child, who was not an avid pleasure reader growing up, came to me to express regret over years spent doing only light reading and requesting some titles to ease into more sustantial works. It was one of the best gifts I've ever received. You truly cannot predict how your kids are going to grow and change.
Thinking about: Aaron Ames' article in Circe, because I am often thinking about articles from Circe. Much food for thought relating to the principle of delight and the principle of efficiency. Of utility versus community. (Comunity can and ought to also refer to the community we build in our family)
"For the adult, work is not play, but for the child, play and work might as well be the same thing. The child relishes the opportunity to work, even calling this play, but the adult relishes the opportunity to play, if only he can manage to take a break from work."
His thoughts echoed our own as we discussed what was lost by the adult child who could not see a way to marry academic and income earning productivity with literature and by the mother (me) who gets caught in assigning restorative and challenging creative opportunities to others while diving further into utilitarian tasks herself.
"Milton counseled us generations ago that our ever-increasing lust for utilitarian productivity and self-sustaining independence would be our destruction."
Reading: I read Jane Eyre this month. I have shuddered and wept and rejoiced. I have mulled over the similarities and differences between Jane and Kristin Lavransdatter from last year's reading. Similar themes in some ways – desire, self government, morality. Similarly meloncholic but devout and introspective women. Similarly intense male characters. Both reflect on the will of God – how we honor it, where we go astray, and the very real consequences of both. I am sure I will be thinking deeply about all of this for some time to come.
Towards wellness: Talking T-Tapp with friends. I wrote this off some twenty years ago but am revisiting after a host of biohacker and paleo folks have discovered these old school exercises. There is plenty of opportunity for cardio around here in summer. For the next several weeks I am taking 15 minutes a day to strengthen and tone. The muscle isolation work hurts like heck fwiw.
Plans for the week: Another road trip. This time we are blessed to be heading to the meeting ground for east coast and west coast friends. It is a beautiful thing when your long time 'virtual' friends become dear 'in person' friends.
The past few months have been full of training for my husband's 2017 project – the triathalon. A long time distance runner, he decided to stretch himself and try something different. This weekend we are on the road doing his first competition, a 750m/20km/5km (swim/bike/run) triathalon sprint.
The day started early with a 630am arrival.
We got the bike checked in and he suited up.
Then it was time to dive in. The water was a cool 60 degrees this morning.
The swim portion proved to be a lot more challenging than expected. Consensus was that more opportunity to train in open water is needed before the next competition. He was a lot happier when he got to the biking and running which was far more familiar territory.
He finished and has a lot of ideas now of what the specific challenges are and how to address those. We were really impressed with the team of teens who competed today and inspired some of ours to consider some joint race efforts. Them, not me lol.
Someone asked last week how I felt about 50. Midcentury, as it turns out, is proving to be full of possibilities and new horizons. So my answer would be encouraged. We are encouraged and grateful going forward. We aren't ready for the rockers yet.
Another track season is on the books. As it turns out track is nearly ideal for this mom viewer. Not too hot, not too cold. And bleachers. Lots of perks. Not the least of which was that what turned out to be a just ok first season last year became a really respectable second year of the sport. I'm glad his coach convinced him to sign up again. It's often hard to predict what you will excel at at the beginning. I hope that's one of the life lessons he takes away.
Tess has been enjoying her pack of art cards from Christmas. We randomly pulled the top card today to hang up and discuss. It was Munch's The Scream. Not my fave but we remembered some perspective drawings saved on Pinterest and decided to do those instead of a strict copy. I think they came out exceptionally well, though Tess' looks a little more angry than frightened.
This project combines several different media and techniques so lots of bang for your lesson time buck. Links here and here Related projects here.
Starry Sky Journal 