A houseful of teenaged girls, around here at least, means there is going to be a day of dressing up and indulging in old fashioned elegance.  I had been thinking we would do a Les Mis project while our lovely guests were here. In the end it became more of a Downton Abbey theme, probably because the props were pulled from the corners of our house which is definitely all about that. 

These dear friends are back in Germany now and by fall they will be an ocean away. I am so glad we got to capture these moments before that happens. 

"Incline Thine ear, O Lord, and make bright the darkness…."

– prayer for Gaudete Sunday

Because isn't this what we really need?  Like everyone else I have been deeply saddened by the innocents lost last week, as well as by the darkness which envelopes a heart and allows such a thing to come to pass. But in the end, great positive change doesn't come through policies, but through people.  It does not come in big sweeping blasts of condemnation and commotion, but in tiny lights which come together to illuminate a dark world. 

Some things will never be heard through bull horns.  Messages of love and peace, like prayers, can only be heard through whispers.  They are spread through clasped hands and never raised fists or pointed fingers. They spill forth, a heart overflow.  Gentleness and awe cannot be coerced, but are often inspired.

So this is what we do.  We slow down.  We whisper joy.  We share beauty. We find peace and take great care in a restless and reckless time.  We try to forgive immense pains, extend grace, and to step back from heated arguments.  Instead of shouting into the darkness, or fixing our gaze there, we stop and make light, right where we are. 

And yes, there are those who are waiting, ready to extinguish our fragile flames.

Indeed they are there.  

We must be as unceasing as they, quietly lighting vigil candles of charity in every corner of the world we find ourselves.  There is no other way.

Be a light in your corner of the world today – a light-seeker, a light-bearer.  Make a heart bright. 

Moira's tree twinkles from the upstairs window tonight. It is so pretty and she is so pleased, which makes me delighted too.  That happily went on the done list.  

Though I then remembered that I hadn't ordered the pictures that were to go in the cards.  And the boxes the movers marked as Christmas, seem to hold many things.  Like a tent.  And a dryer vent. Lesson plans.  And the beautiful hand me down wool coats I had hoped to find before winter's end.  That last part was another score.  But no wreaths, which like many things more important in one place than another, can be difficult to find in a new country.  So it was a mixed bag – or box as the case may be. Life tends to be.  

Things rarely go as quickly or easily as we expect. 

When I snapped this picture over Moira's dresser I thought of all those things and a number of phrases came to mind standing there…

Christmastime

There is not enough time.

Find time.

Me time. 

Overtime.

Down time.

Don't waste time. 

Another time. 

The best of times. 

All the time.

We have to pick from that sort of stream of conscience every moment. I hope we are choosing well.  I pray we are.  And I pray that when we don't, we are granted the grace to redirect. 

Out my window: wind. It is sunny with high cottony clouds wafting across the sky. The crab apples are all blushed and swinging wildly from the tree in the orchard.

Listening to: “Blue 42 – hike! Floor to table. Hustle hustle hustle!” Kieran is leading schoolroom pickup. Chores are just more fun during football season. ; )

Musically- am loving BBC radio. Loving it. I am picking up a radio for the kitchen so I can bring all that fun out of the car where I linger in the driveway when we get home. New fave – Jerry Douglas.

Reading: finally finished Jane Austen’s Emma since I have been reading other things with it. It really picked up after page 300 fwiw. It was a fantastic read considering nothing actually happened in all 400 pages. Not an action title to be sure, but spot on characterization. You will see people you know in those pages.

Afterwards I began “Horses Don’t Lie About love”. Sorry no links. Story about a woman who moved out west and began a horse farm with some nearly feral stock. Totally different tone from Ree Drummond but I love a good memoir.

From the learning rooms: making new file games. Journaling. Lots of art. Tess’ reading is taking off.

Creating: embroidery. Tess has been working on a back stitched pear for a tea towel. I had Moira sit with her supervising when I had to leave the room. Moments later Moira announced she wanted to sew. And she did. A butterfly, a shamrock and finally a large DANCE on her dance shorts.

Around the house: been here long enough to have to clean the cabinets out in the kitchen. Feeling much tidier now.

Plans: football practice – the new normal. A date which will likely net a new computer set up this weekend. Which means all kinds of fun for my camera with the over flowing memory card. ; )

It always seems to come in unexpected ways and at just the right time. Life expands and contracts and our circles do the same in this ever changing landscape of our mobile life. Giving birth to a life is like that. Labor and rest. Confidence and doubt. Peaks and valleys. Very often it is those dips into the valley that spark the most progress.

This week was frustrating without my camera or software. My card is full and the computer must go to the shop. I don’t dare clear my card til I can back up the images. But I don’t sit on my hands well making nothing. I ended up trying two things. Instagram and film.

I pulled out my old film camera which I only used in automatic mode all those years ago. It was a good camera, however, with a couple nice lenses which I knew nothing about when I won that auction on eBay 8 years ago. My phone yielded a PDF manual to bring me up to speed and locate all the functions. I very happily dropped off a roll of film with a very nice British gentleman the other night.

When I told my husband I had nearly convinced myself to switch back he listened quietly. Then said he still wanted also push forward with the new computer and software and equipment we have been planning for. A both/and solution to the either/or scenario in my head. : ) You can do this and more he said. And more. And we are going to make it happen.

Then came a long overdue phone call on a slightly crackly line to an old friend who can be counted on to always say oh yes you can! You can can apples. You can read more Jane Austen. You can tend a cutting garden. You CAN.

This morning I listened to that yes you can and pushed myself out into chilly morning air to jog (jog-walk-jog-walk) with Toby Mac. I came back thinking how beautiful the clouds were over my chimney and how much I love the kitchen door. And geraniums. And being brave. And saying yes.

I checked mail and found a sweet comment from the wildly creative Jennifer and clicked back to catch up with her doings. Turns out it was the National Day of encouragement this week. I missed it. Officially anyway. But certainly enjoyed all the perks in practice. I paid it forward by taking a couple extra minutes to tell her what I often think when I read her notes – thank you.

She got me thinking about how the Internet rather encourages a bit of consumerism. We click in and out. We glean. We use ideas and off we go. Those people don’t often know how much they have blessed us or just how amazing they really are. I am trying not to forget that as I visit and learn.

If you haven’t visited here before you are in for a treat:

http://studiojru.com/2012/09/12/national-day-of-encouragement/#comment-15591

"The true picture of the effective home teacher is more often a secure and happy mom. She and the children do straightening up chores the first thing each day so that the home with provide an organized, clean environment for learning.  She selects learning tasks for which each child is ready. She requires only enough daily practice or drill to allow her children to progress appropriately to mastery of basic skills. Fun projects are used to integrate and reinforce basic skills. And much of the day is framed around the children's interests with work and service that build genuine golden rule citizens,"

– The Successful Homeschool Family Handbook, Dr. Raymond and Dorothy Moore

Golden rule citizens.  Leave to dear Dr. Moore to help us articulate the highest and best vision and to lay out practical ways to get there.   It occurred to me that my homeschool library probably seems highly contradictory. (as well as outdated – intentionally) Still, I find these older books have common messages at their heart which still inspire me to begin again each year just as enthusiastically as I did with those little boys long ago.  

(We have begun again, a little bitty bit, with a brand new bookcases in a very old house.  The school room is coming together and I am so enjoying this new old space.)

Or rather, a roundabout.

“I’m gonna ride it allll night looong,”

 These are the lyrics playing in my head on the way
home.  We have been here a month
now.  I should feel as nonchalant as I
sound taking down the directions to Moira’s babysitting job.  29 years of driving under my belt and all.
I’ve got this.  I think.

 A wave of (over)confidence washed over me as we pulled into
the drive after a nearly flawless, uneventful trip there.  I delivered her just a little bit late, which
isn’t half bad for my record.  

The round trip was so named for a reason.

 “’Round and ‘round and ‘round she goes, where she stops
nobody knows….”

Agnes, the GPS, sometimes has these great ideas.  Today was one of those days.  She suggested I enter the dual carriage-way
(two lanes either direction) left, cross the lanes of traffic, cross the
median, and enter right – into the passing lane – going the other
direction.  Since both lanes on my
initial side were full and she gave me 200ft to make this maneuver it was a no-go.  No problem, says Agnes.  There is a roundabout (or 7…) just
ahead. 

 The big roundabouts (opposed to the mini’s or the double
mini’s) are like huge wheels with spokes radiating off and out onto other roads
or, sadistically, into yet more roundabouts. 
They have two lanes.  Therein lies
the problem. You are to be in the inner lane until you need to exit, when you
are to move to the outer lane.  This all
has to happen in a matter of feet, complete with turn signals.  If you have no earthly clue which exit you
need then your ear is straining to hear your GPS cues, which inevitably are
announced just as you approach the exit – in the wrong lane. Such was my lot.

What followed was a Chevy Chase flashback. I could have my
own National Lampoon production and those are words I never thought I would
write. Reminiscent of a very bad ‘dizzy cowboy’ experience years ago. To
correct the faulty exit, Agnes sent to me a series of other roundabouts until
we were pointing homeward again.

A smidge unsettled, I later missed my turn right in our
nearest village and veered off onto the street instead.  That doesn’t sound like a problem now does
it? As it turns out, there is a street in this area aptly named “The Street.” Where
do you live?  The Street.  Which street? 
The Street.  Who’s on first?  Wha..?

 All’s well that ends well though and it did.  Eventually my vehicle, a Gulliver in
this land of smart-car Lilliputians, turned in on the farm lane.  The circulation returned to my knuckles as
the hares darted in and out of the hedgerow and I gave myself a high five. 
Kieran was at the table reading his book report book when I walked in.  Marquette and Joliet.  “Did you know they had a paddler?” he
says.

   “Hm, what?” I said,
hanging up my keys.

 “Marquette.  He
had his own paddler on his trips.” 

And in that moment a solution to all my roadway
misadventures appeared, right there in paperback.

I just need a paddler. 

  Driving.     Alas this is not my skill set. 

Please join us for some recent thoughts on both over at Suscipio:
http://www.suscipio4women.com/2012/07/25/one-big-frothy-mess/
(no Internet at home yet)

…the wellies that is.   : ) 

I recently ran across the daughter of a homeschooling friend of mine from many many years ago.  She was a young high school student at the time.  Now she is a stunning young woman living in NYC and involved in some really amazing projects.  I have just read through the teaser issue of the new magazine she is writing for which promises to be 'an antidote to Cosmo.' Heaven knows we could use that.  The premiere made the Huffington Post here. 

She is part of the Love and Fidelity Network here.

She cowrites a blog called True Glamour and Grace 

I am so pleased to have quality, inspiring resources to point my own daughters toward. 

Way to go, Ashley!