“while there may have been a time when a woman could keep a house, tend a garden, sew and spin and raise twelve children, things are different now; life is more complicated. You owe your husband something; you owe yourself something. I want to get on, to study, to travel, to be a companion to my husband. I don’t want to be a mere servant!”

“How many of you are there?”
“Seven.”
“Seven? My heaven-seven children!”
“My grandmother had ten. Imagine having ten children.”
“Everything’s different now. Everything’s more expensive. Life’s more complicated.”

A ’60s feminist overheard? Women analyzing the Duggar’s latest announcement? No. These lines were published in 1911 which completely surprised me. I really assumed the sentiments were fairly contemporary. Apparently not.

I have a stack of new books here and this one was devoured in two days. Mother, written by Kathleen Norris in 1911 tells the tale of Margaret Paget, a small town schoolteacher who gets the opportunity to pursue a career in New York. She sees this as her ticket out of what she considers the drudgery and hopelessness her parents are locked into. She finds plenty of sympathetic, encouraging voices in the world. Somehow they begin to ring hollow in time.

I don’t think I give away the ending any more than the book jacket does when I say that she comes full circle to reject the self-absorbed lifestyle rampant in her new world and embraces family in the end. She learns that:

“Travel and position, gowns and motorcars, yachts and country houses, these things were to be bought in all their perfection by the highest bidder and always would be. But love and character and service, home and the wonderful charge of little lives…..these were not to be bought; they were only to be prayed for and worked for and bravely won.”

This is the book I will share with my daughters by way of explanation. This is the book I will hand those who ask “Why? Was it worth it? Didn’t you want something more?”

More? More than everything, you mean? I have some wonderful apologetic type books but nothing is as compelling as story. This story richly demonstrates the bible verse that:

“…whoever wishes to save his life will lose it and whoever gives up his life for my sake will find it.”

(note – You will want the Vision Forum restored edition. It seems later editions of the original edited out the heart of the story. )

The boys ‘crossed over’ this weekend. A very eventful day even if the weather was not entirely cooperative. Aidan became a Bear Scout:

Kieran, after waiting patiently lo these past two years, will now be a Tiger Scout. I think he has had the scarf on since….

Brendan’s fondest desire is to be a Cub ‘cout:

Mary Engelbreit’s Home Companion online supplement. had an article about the midcentury magazine covers of illustrator Al Parker. In particular the article highlighted his mother/daughter series. The author says:

The simple compositions often depicted the daughter learning something from the mother or helping her in some way. Everywhere I looked, moms and daughters were happily skating, swimming, making holiday decorations, or buying war bonds together. I guess there was no such thing as a generation gap in those days.

The illustrations are as wonderful as described. They made me think of my own daughters and how our relationship is growing and changing. Both of the older girls are becoming delightful young women. Both are eager and capable workers, one more domestically inclined, the other more at home outside. Both of them fall into step with whatever task I have at hand, quietly and confidently filling in where extra hands are needed while happy chatter passes the time.

Moira is my right hand in the barn. She never needs to be told, just quietly works her way around the barn feeding and moving stock in or out. We don’t need words as we milk together. We each know our part and can work together comfortably.

Alannah has become quite adept at seeing what needs to happen with homemaking and little ones. She took it upon herself to reorganize the little boys’ drawers and closet a few weeks back. I overheard her admonishing them to try to keep them up because “mom has a lot to do”. I snapped this picture the other day. I walked into the kitchen and she was sorting the drop pile at the edge of the counter without prompting. Now, I love my boys with all my heart but I don’t think it has ever occurred to one of their gender to stop at a pile and sort it on the spot.

All is not drudgery. We laugh and shop and pray and play a good deal. It is just a different relationship from that which I share with my boys and I feel so blessed to have both experiences.

We were firsthand witnesses to a massive grassfire this afternoon. It started near the highway just moments before Asher and I passed by. The nearby fields were already charred and smoke was billowing high in the sky as the flames marched relentlessly across the prairie fueled by 40mph winds.

Allen came home a different route and found himself right alongside the fire which by then had traveled many miles. He got these pictures which were sobering to say the least. As he was passing, a barn and home caught fire. It is shocking to see how quickly everything you have can be reduced to ashes.

911 has sent a number of reverse call messages today. We got the last a few minutes ago. The fire is finally contained some 7 hrs later after burning over 9000 acres. We are grateful none of them were ours but we mourn for the ranchers who lost so much. It was heart wrenching to see the stock trailers racing by to evacuate horses and cattle.

Overheard in the van….

Kieran: Hey Zach, do you know the (insert family name of neighbors)?

Zach: Yep.

Kieran: Well ‘cuz they’re pretty much all cowboys.

Zach: Yeah?

Kieran: Yeah. You can tell ‘cuz they got those big belts. You know, with the big silver where they connect.

Zach: Ahhh.

And there you have it. ; )

This is a really beautiful metaphor for Christian marriage. Set aside all the loaded arguments for leading, submitting, and who should be doing what and see the bigger picture.

Hat tip to my dear friend Jen.

Kris wrote a very insightful comment about vintage homemaking:

I think the thing that stuck with me the most was one blurb about them not having time to socialize except on Sunday’s…every other day they expected to be *tied* up with their homemaking chores. At the time it really blew my mind because it really sounded like they just didn’t consider doing anything but their *duty* during the week/Saturday. Such a difference from our current culture’s frame of mind. I think Anna has hit upon something that a lot of women don’t realize ( or don’t want to realize) that homemaking takes ALOT of time ( especially to do it well). It isn’t drudgery, just using your time to bless your family instead of buzzing about here and there and leaving it undone ( or half done).

I have thought about the same things many times. That same conversation came up this past week with our older sons. We have been talking a good deal about work ethic and going the extra mile versus just doing the minimum. We talked about going over and above and doing every job with equal gusto, not just the ones you like best. We talked about proper ratio of work and play in life and pointed out that God gave us “a” day of rest. For most of us, that means that, if we are doing things right, we will be doing them the better part of most days. Rest will come in fleeting bits through the week but we can look forward to Sunday to thoroughly unwind.

If your recall the Amish book mentioned waaaay back one of the things the author learned was that for the Amish the work wasn’t drudgery because each job was valued equally. Therefore there was no gritting one’s teeth through one job so as to get it done or get to a ‘better’ one. No putting off the ‘yucky jobs’ while reading email. The secret to their contentment was that they had learned to make peace with each activity and give it the same attitude as they will the one to come. This has the two-fold blessing of making tasks more pleasant and also keeping one focused and out of trouble.

I think so often about 1 Tim 5:13

And withal being idle they learn to go about from house to house: and are not only idle, but tattlers also, and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not.

What so often happens in our free time is generally not a blessing to ourselves nor to others. We don’t live in close knit communities anymore where we linger over the fence while hanging laundry. We do have the internet however and the phone. We can go ‘from house to house’ in seconds without even the commute to slow us down.

I know, for me, it is much better to remain busy and spend more time caring for home and family than chattering about my fellow man – or woman. I so easily fall into that when idle. Maybe that is just a personal vice. I am coming to realize it is a blessing and not a curse to have my days spoken for. Housework and childcare are not burdens to be freed from but unparalleled opportunities to grow and develop character. What a shame they are so quickly shaken off in favor of words.

Now, lest you think I am insufferable lecturer I am going to print this off and paste it to my forehead. You know by now, I hope, that I talk to myself here first and foremost.