I read this awesome bk last month called Take Your Time by Eknath Easwaran. I decided to buy it because I had dog eared every other page to quote and realized the author had ONLY written substantial words and refrained from any filler fluff. It was all quotable and noteworthy – which ended up being part of the overall message.

Mr Easwaran is a college professor originally from India. He grew up in the Buddhist tradition though he does not write with the intention of converting his audience. His whole gist is about slowing down and paying way better attention to each person and activity you find yourself face to face with. Those are his driving principles. If you can’t slow down enough to pay attention to everything you do, say, and hear then you are doing too much and need to cull. He feels that the reason we are forgetful is that we didnt really give our full attention the first time around. Thats why we cant recall if we unplugged the iron or locked the car etc. We were spacing out when we did those things versus being truly present and having our heads ‘in the game’ so to speak. He maintains you can eliminate unnecessary stress by focusing your attention on whatever tasks – big or small – are at hand. This echoes the Sue Bender Amish experience book‘s lesson about the source that community’s contentment with their daily work. That whole intentional living again.

He had many examples of how applied application impacted our lives – from daily tasks to career to personal relationships. Bottom line was HOW. How do we achieve that level of attentiveness that assures a focused life and optimal functioning? He said that when our attention wanders we shouldn’t fret but rather just call it back to the task at hand cheerfully like it was a puppy. No need to berate ourselves nor overanalyze our distractedness. As long we keep calling back our attention then we will eventually get mastery over it.

I got another book this week called Buddhism and Motherhood by Sarah Napthali. Now of course I am totally not a Buddhist any more than I am Amish. Rather, I saw it on the Soulemama reading list and picked it up being intrigued by the subtitle: A Calm Approach to Caring for Yourself and Your Children. I won’t go into a theological treatise, just suffice it to say while I disagree with to whom and what the authors attribute truth still I found common threads in all of these messages and with Fr Lovasik’s wonderful Power of Kindness. The motherhood author said we need to be gentle, patient, and persistent with ourselves in calling our attention back. It occurred to me that this applies to our child training too. Children’s attention WILL wander and get off track. We need to be gentle, patient, yet persistent in calling them back to the present – to the task at hand. If we can just cheerfully persist they will eventually master themselves and their responsibilities and so will we.

All three attributes need to be in place to be effective however – the persistence AND the gentle patience. Gentleness because scripture tells us “a kind word turns away wrath”. Gentleness is a fruit of the Holy Spirit in the Christian tradition, one of the signs that we are in step with the Lord. We are to “clothe ourselves with compassion, kindness, gentleness and patience”. We are also told not to lose heart when we are exhorted to “watching thereunto with all perseverance” and to not “weary in doing well” – whether we have done so once or twice or seventy times seven times. Our demeanor ought to be the same the first and last times – one tall order in an age of instant gratification.

Therefore, it is necessary to really commit ourselves to the challenge. We also need to realize that this kind of progress comes slowly after a LOT of repeating gently and patiently. Persistence pays off though. If we just don’t quit we can’t lose in the end. We just have to promise ourselves we aren’t going to give up. How could we fail if just refused to stop persisting cheerfully? The game isn’t over til someone throws in the towel. Let’s not let it be us.